A Sussex based blogger sharing a candid tale of 20-something humanness

Saturday, 24 September 2011

Pipe Dreams and Flem-Free Tea

Yesterday, in between stuffing my face with homemade muffins (Sara, you complete babe), contemplating shaving my legs mid-meeting, and trying to remember whether I'd put my oh-so-important weekend bottle of wine in the fridge (I do share it, I promise...) I met a man, and he said something that a) irritated the hell out of me, b) made me have to put on my very best fake smile and complimentary laughter, and c) has resulted in me writing this blog post.

The man, who I had met in a professional setting (hence the fake smile and complimentary laughter), was a 60-something, suited and booted self-made success, who had a beard so shiny, I spent a good twelve minutes debating whether or not it was real silver. (There really are moments in life where this activity is the most exciting thing that's happened all day.)

Said man and I were having a chat about things that two forty-year-age-gap strangers who could not be more different chat about. We discussed the weather (in depth), the oh-so-charming Autumnal view across the hills, and my aspirations, dreams, and ambitions, which I have noticed, is a hot topic amongst my elders. Quite evidently, he'd wanted me to say something along the lines of Neurologist, University Professor, or Astronaut, as when I told him my biggest dream was to sit at an antique desk writing all day-every-day for every Tom, Dick, Harry and Sandra that may want me to, he threw his silver-coated head back and laughed. Yes, he laughed.

As if this wasn't enough, he then said, "Aww, I guess having a pipe dream gives you something nice to think about, but it won't pay the mortgage. What do you really want to do?"

(Please take this opportunity to imagine how hard it was for me to simply smile, laugh, and then make this man, who was quite happy to write my biggest dream off as the shittest thing since the break-up of Brad and Jen, a delicious cup of flem-free tea.)

While said man is a bit of an extreme example, this isn't the first time someone has thrown the words 'pipe' and 'dream' at me, and tried to gently (or not so, in this case) encourage me to give up completely as oppose to tell me 'that's a brilliant idea, I believe in you!' And I'm pretty sure that it's not just me that's putting up with this tidal wave of pessimism that seems to have swept over a good bulk of the human population.

Yes, the economic state of the Country isn't brilliant, yes, I agree that mortgages, cars, and engraved crockery don't come cheap, and yes, I know that you have to work bloody hard to make something of yourself. Life after all, clearly isn't always a bed of roses. But that doesn't mean I'm prepared to live it without planting the seeds, and dedicating a big chunk of it to trying to achieve the things that I want to, whilst settling for a job that pays the bills in the meantime.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with chasing a dream, and I wish people would realise it. After all, striving towards something is the world's greatest adventure, and in a decade where young people are constantly in the press for all the wrong reasons; laying on the street completely frazzled with their knickers on full display, spreading Chlamydia/Herpes/any other horrific sounding STI, and parading round in hoodies shouting obscenities, the ambitious, hard-working ones should come as a welcome relief.

So dream big fine ladies, and don't let anyone try and convince you to do otherwise. After all, dreaming is one of the healthiest things you can do (much more so than a 20 minute jog), and if you believe in it enough, and work equally as hard, I'm certain that we can all turn those dreams into our reality.

I look forward to seeing your names on the front of book covers, in the GP directory, on the front of CDs, on clothing labels, on the box of the nicest pie ever made, and wherever else you'd like them to end up.

What are your dreams?

Love you to all, and a huge HELLO to all my new followers. :)

Peace xXx


  1. Hey! Following from cosmo. He sounds like a patronising dick and I'm glad you haven't let it put out your fire. Remember nothing good was ever accomplished without passion!

  2. Aw, thank you very much! Don't get me wrong, apart from this comment he was a very nice man! But it was definitely patronising!

    I completely agree with you right there, passion is the driving force behind accomplishment! Xx

  3. I think your a good writer by how you write your blog and I wouldn't take notice of the comment if he doesn't know you well anyway. :)

  4. This has really brightened my day, it's great to read your positivity :)

    I think that the older generation had a lot less opportunities available to them, so dreams that seem achievable to us seem impossible to them. I am forever arguing with my grandad about what I want to do with my life!

    Keeping dreaming big xxxxx

  5. I fully get you Kathy, I've got into the habit of saying 'my dream job is journalist but I will probs end up as an admin assistant or something'. It's a bad habit I need to get out of!! Your post rings so true, I think I love you more every time you post?! xxxxx

  6. Thank you Vicki and Becca! :) I think you've made a really good point there Vicki, I guess although the job market isn't great, the job types available have definitely increased!

    And Becca, don't be silly! If you believe in yourself, others will start to believe in you too! I'm sure you'll do great! :) Thank you so much! Xx

  7. Well this guy sounds like a total idiot. I'm so glad you've taken his comments on your chin; I know that this sort of thing makes you even more determined to prove the idiots wrong. You WILL make something of yourself as a writer, I know you will. Carry on dreaming big :) xxxx

  8. Thank you Victor! I love you incredibly! Xx

  9. Hello, I really love your blog! I love popping on and reading the latest posts, it's so easy to follow! I've awarded you the Liebester blog award here


    :) xx

  10. :) Thank you Louise! I'm so chuffed! You have made my day xXx

  11. Amen, sister! I wish you could've told him where to go.. I clearly don't need to tell you to follow your dreams, dear, you seem like you won't take no for an answer! (;

    - Jaimie

  12. Just read this post and ugh I was screaming inside! I HATE people like that! With a passion! I read it out to my mum,dad and cat and they had to endure a 10 minute debate about people like that and how dare he say that to you,because you are a fantastic writer! If I was there I would have told him how amazing you are and how much of a prick he is! The difference between you and me honey is that I would have told him where he can stick his idea that my dream is a pipe dream up his droopy, flabby posterior! What a dick! He is the type of guy that would decide his children's careers for them. Yes paying the mortgage and all that is important, but I'd much rather live in an okish house and get up in the morning and have a huge smile on my face because I love what I'm doing. Much better then working all hours in a job I hate, to live in a huge house and have all these things,never see my children and not be able to enjoy the money that I've earned and end up looking haggard at like 45! I hate those type of people. I could never do a job that I wasn't happy in. You should definitely follow your dreams honey and don't listen to anyone that says otherwise. It's good to have a dream. At the end of the day,you just have to be happy in yourself. I'll stop ranting and rambling now! XxxX

  13. Thank you girls! And I completely agree with everything you've both just said! Happiness and writing for the love of it is more important to me than the big bucks! They'd just be a bonus!

    Thanks so much for your comments! :) xXx

  14. Yes, I completely agree! :) Xx


Thanks so much for reading. I'd love to hear your thoughts. Don't forget to leave a link to some of your own writing; I'm always on the look out for more reading material.

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